Betrothal trays: a wedding guide
The groom's family carries gift trays to the bride's family. Each tray holds fruit, sweets or tea.
When couples book this
Usually booked about six weeks out. It moves with your date — the wedding's, since a Thai khan maak is the wedding morning, a Cantonese guo da li two to four weeks before, and a Vietnamese ăn hỏi the wedding morning or weeks ahead; a betrothal held earlier than that counts from its own date. The fresh contents are dressed in the days before.
Still deciding the wedding
Your wishlist
Answer these before you meet anyone.
Whose tradition are the trays for?
How many trays?
The count is the family's call — odd in northern Vietnam, even in the south and in a Chinese guo da li; a Thai khan maak goes in pairs. In Vietnamese practice the bride's family names the number. The elders' number wins.
Comparing your options
How it’s usually priced
Usually priced per item.
Possible extras: Tray contents (fruit, tea, delicacies).
Booked and settling details
What you settle once booked
What goes on the trays?
Each family's list is its own — tea, fruit, roast pig, jewelry, wine, betel. The elders' list wins; it carries onto the vendor's brief.
Who carries them?
One carrier per tray, so the count follows the trays. Vietnamese families pair unmarried bearers side for side — young men on the groom's side, young women on the bride's, the same number each, swapping red envelopes as the trays pass. In Cantonese practice the groom's parents and married relatives carry the guo da li. In a Thai khan maak the thao kae leads, the groom and his parents follow, and his family and friends carry the pairs.
The week of the wedding
The day-of sheet
Confirm arrival, finish, who to call, access, a meal, and what is due.
Across the whole day
Choose which moments to include.
- Tray procession
For businesses
The brief a couple sends you has these sections:
- The trays
- The event
- Contacts